A Touching Visit with R

man-touching-womans-face

 

While I won’t go into great detail about using the psychomanteum for contacting our beloved dead as a form of grief therapy, I do want to mention it because for many, it may be the most important personal use of mirror gazing.

My second solo visit to the psychomanteum was for the sole purpose of contacting R, my deceased first husband and, I feel, the initiator and co-founder of the Community of Spirits. I’d waited a very long time for this experience and who better to guide me through it than Dr. Raymond Moody.

If you read his book Reunions, at the time you will see he had a very elaborate and lengthy process to undergo before entering the psychomanteum in order to visit with a beloved dead. Over the years he has found that the simpler, the better. So I didn’t need to bring photos or mementos of R. Instead I just talked about him – sharing many memories, happy, sad…sharing the best things about our marriage and my deepest regrets. We did that for at least an hour and it was quite emotional for me. Then Dr. Moody found what I thought was the perfect piece of nonsense poetry (I do not remember its name at this time). It was amazing to me how very moving this piece of nonsense was, how it managed to somehow capture the feeling in my heart, bringing me to tears.

With that, I entered the psychomanteum alone with no music. I was in there for a very long time, likely several hours (Dr. Moody had forgotten a timepiece and wanted to be sure I had plenty of time for the experience). It took a while to get past some normal household noise (his two teenagers were home and their voices were easily heard) but with time, I got past that.

I wish I could say R materialized in the mirror, that he came out and appeared in 3-D next to me. I truly wish I could – but he didn’t. I did see a formation of white in the mirror, as if he was trying to take form but R never materialized visually for me. And honestly – that made me sad, very sad because I had waited so long and prepared for this so long. Tears began flowing down my cheeks. Then…I felt…the lightest touch. It felt like R was running a finger down my tears to dry them. After that…the lightest kiss on my lips. Oh my God! Was I imagining this? But it happened again later in our visit.

What I am finding out with practice is that, we each will receive information or contact in different ways. Clairvoyance or extra sight is not my forte. I hear and feel and smell and know much easier than I see. With his touch, I relaxed into the experience. Again, Dr. Moody cautions us to “try not to try.” Oh yeah, that is easy. But…finally I surrendered to experience in whatever shape it was going to take. I just relaxed and let go of any and all expectations.

Before I knew it, my mind was filled with reminisces – happy ones, sad one, intimate ones, private ones. And he made me laugh as he did in physical life as he was quite the clown. The tears flowed and again I felt his gentle touch tracing my tears, his soft kiss. I told him I was so frustrated that I couldn’t see him like other have with their loved ones…that I couldn’t actually hear his voice, our communication was telepathic.

What he said to that was powerful, he said, “That is because we share the same space.” Rudolf Steiner tells us that the dead are not “somewhere else.” They are right here only at a higher level of frequency. We share the same space. He also tells us that our loved ones can reside within us. That is not a metaphor. Our beloved dead can live right inside us. They have access to all our thoughts, our memories, our emotions. They know us truly better now than when they were in the flesh.

So I believe that might be why I may never see R appear visually in the mirror, nor actually hear his voice. We’ve been communication for a couple of years now, in this different way and I may have to be content with that. Trust in that. Strengthen that.

I also got that sense that though R will always be a part of my team of those across the threshold who will guide this work, a good deal of what he was tasked to do is completed. He was the motivating factor to push me from working with the dying to working with the dead. He will always be there, cheering me on but perhaps in the background a bit more as the others begin to come forward. In the next post, I will begin sharing those encounters with you.

So mirror gazing can be a powerful tool for easing grief by allowing you to connect with your beloved dead. It takes time and practice and patience. It may also take figuring out just how you receive information. But I highly recommend it to seeking out a medium. Why not make direct contact yourself instead of relying on someone else who may or may not be ethical in their practice?

Take good care until next time…

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